Episode 7

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Published on:

17th Oct 2023

Into The Badlands S3E16 - you want me yuking your yums

It's time for Last Time On, the podcast for everyone who wants to watch all of that prestige television, but who has time for that? Our hosts don't, so they take the randomized highway down your favorite shows they haven't seen, and try to guess what happened Last Time On!

Join us as Ben and Xhafer find out that the real magic was Bajie this entire freakin' time.

Transcript
Xhafer:

Hello and welcome to Last Time On.

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This is the podcast for people who want

to watch all this prestige television.

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But honestly, who's got

fucking time for that?

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Ben: I know I don't.

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Xhafer: I'm Jafar.

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Ben: And I am Ben.

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Xhafer: we are here with our

finale of Into the Badlands.

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Ben: Doesn't it feel like we just started?

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Xhafer: feel like we just started?

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We did.

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Ben: Oh right, that's the

whole point of this game.

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Xhafer: It is what we are doing.

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here.

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Um.

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I was,

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One, surprised to see...

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The cliffhanger ending.

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Yeah,

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Ben: Uh, yeah.

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Xhafer: I tried seeing if there

was a, synopsis of someone had

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said what season four was gonna be.

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Nope.

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Ben: Yeah.

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Uh, but

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Xhafer: Yeah.

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Uh, but

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not, not the full on.

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I couldn't find anything that might be

fun to read as we go over predictions.

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Ben: We don't know where

it might have gone.

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Yeah.

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That's too bad.

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I was excited to finally be able to

like, start looking up production

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information and everything, and It,

it seemed like the show kind of got

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jerked around by AMC, who were just

like, You're not as popular as The

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Walking Dead, you're therefore useless.

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Uh, and found out Season 3 aired over

the course of like a year and a half.

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Xhafer: Yeah.

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Ben: Which is just like, oh you

only do this if you hate a TV show.

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Or your Battlestar Collective.

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Xhafer: No, no, still applies.

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yeah.

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Yeah,

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So, uh, a bit unfortunate to

see that this is our finale.

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Uh, but we do get a wrap

up to most storylines.

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Yes.

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So let's get into it.

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, we open on the Widow giving Sonny a sword.

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Ben: Yeah,

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Xhafer: Stephen Lang's sword.

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Yeah,

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is this the first time we've seen

these two characters together?

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Ben: We know they have interacted,

but we've never seen it.

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Uh, oh no, they, they

interact in the pilot.

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Xhafer: No,

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they don't.

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Oh, oh, yes.

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Yeah, yeah.

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In the town, they interact for a

couple of seconds in the pilot.

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And she's like,

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Ben: hey, come work for

me, and he's like, no.

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, I'm only the clipper

for the armadillo clan.

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It's like, haha, no.

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Xhafer: Yep, yep,

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And it's Waldo's sword

whom they can't find.

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Ben: No.

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So Stephen Lang not

confirmed dead, I'm guessing.

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Xhafer: Yeah.

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I said they can't find.

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Ben: Yeah.

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Well that means like,

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Xhafer: like, Yeah, they...

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Ben: because he's been killed off.

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He, he disappeared.

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Yeah, they can't find Waldo then.

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I know, I'm agreeing with you.

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Yeah.

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But I'm saying, elucidating

for the people at home.

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When, when he disappeared,

we're like, oop, is

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Xhafer: Ben And I'm sure I'm

making a where's Waldo joke,

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and you're shitting all over it

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You didn't need to unzip

so hastily there, sir.

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It's uncouth.

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It's okay.

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After this we see our titular

seven from Seven Strike is

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One, the name of this episode.

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Moon, Kanan, Badgey, Sunny,

Minerva, Gaius, and Tilda.

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Ben: Yes, one of these things

is not like the others.

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Xhafer: Uh, and they are greeted

by an army of Black Lotus soldiers.

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Yes.

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Ben: Uh,

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Xhafer: maybe actual Azra, maybe not.

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Pretty sure no, based off of the

things that happened in this episode.

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Ben: that the Black Lotus destroyed Azra.

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Xhafer: Yes.

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But that could also not . that doesn't

mean that they're not from Azra also.

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Um, yeah.

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And it could be metaphorically

destroy azra as well.

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Um, after theme, the pilgrim

turns his 15 dark gifted

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soldiers into also missionaries.

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And most of them let

out a board begrudging.

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Exhale.

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at The thought of missionary.

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Come

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on,

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Ben: I'm sadly shaking my head.

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For those of you at

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Xhafer: you .regardless,

they're still untrained.

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But we get like an

almost zombie looking mk.

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Oh

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Ben: Oh yeah.

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He's, he's burned all bad.

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Xhafer: And he's going to teach

them the secret in three sentences.

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Ben: He's just like, Hey, you don't

have to bleed if you like access your

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pain and sadness, and boom, everybody

suddenly can turn on their gift instantly.

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And it's like, why did they need a

whole, uh, Uh, Kung Fu Monastery.

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Uh, this is real easy.

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Xhafer: Right?

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It's embarrassingly easy.

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It.

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Ben: easy.

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I understand, hey, we've got

a lot of ground to cover.

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Uh, in this episode.

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But I would have loved to have

like one guy who's just like,

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I, what do you mean by that?

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It's just like, think of

some really sad stuff.

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I'm trying.

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I don't know.

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Xhafer: uh,

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so says some shit to Henry that

makes me think he won't make it.

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Ben: Uh, he also gives a significantly

worse pep talk to the good guys,

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who's just like, Hey, we're going

out tomorrow, put your affairs

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in order, we're all gonna die.

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It's like, that's not a

good pep talk, um, Sonny.

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Xhafer: The way he, so he talks to Minerva

after this, and the way he talks about

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the importance of children, makes me

think Tilda isn't actually her daughter.

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In fact, I'm gonna go ahead and,

last time on, uh, because if we

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remember correctly, that renegade...

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That was doing the rebellion

also called her mother.

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Ben: Well that seems to be

consistent among all of her people.

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Yes,

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Xhafer: exactly.

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So last time on I have misread

their entire relationship.

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Tilda is not actually Minerva's daughter.

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Ben: So biologically not related.

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Yes.

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Would explain why they

don't look anything alike.

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Xhafer: alike.

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Yes.

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Ben: So we cut over to, the Pilgrim

and Cressida, and Cressida is

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having second, third, and fourth and

fifth thoughts, about, unleashing

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a, , megalomaniacal, wannabe god on

the world, and giving him superpowers.

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Xhafer: Yep.

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Ben: Turns out, she may be a

horrible person, she's not pro...

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Super genocide.

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Uh, the pilgrim seems hell bent on, , I

can give the the gift to anyone, so

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either you accept it and become one

of my soldiers, or we just kill you.

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Xhafer: Yeah, not even the

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middle ground of, you're willing

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to be oppressed.

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Ben: You're either, kung fu

blood, blood mage or nothing.

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Xhafer: Yep.

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He says that he's going to

empower her with the gift as well.

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Whether or not she wants it.

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Yes.

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And then we have, a montage of our heroes

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with weapons to commercial.

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Ben: Yes, we get a suiting up

montage, which is always awesome.

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Xhafer: Mhmm, always appreciate.

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we come back to them making their plan.

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Badgie and Sunny will storm the

Pilgrim's Temple with the army.

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Uh, and then the rest are to destroy

whatever actually grants the dark gift.

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Ben: Yes, there seems to be this

temple sort of thing that they can use.

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Xhafer: I call it the

Death Star Control Room.

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Ben: It does, it does have

computers and stuff, yeah.

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Xhafer: It's, well, it's even like,

it's not the, like, the main room

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where they fire the guns, but it's

like the room where when they're hiding

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as stormtroopers, they hide out in.

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Like, with the red panels and, like,

the computers are the same shape.

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Ben: that's the, landing bay control room.

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Yes.

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Yes.

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Xhafer: Uh, somebody played

some Star Wars card games,

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?

Ben: I did, but I also just know that 'cause I'm a nerd.

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Uh, Sonny

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Xhafer: because I'm a nerd.

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Uh, Sunny puts Minerva and Gaius

as Henry's emergency contact.

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Ben: Yes.

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Xhafer: And

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Moon goes with Sunny and Badgey

so that he can kill Cressida.

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Ben: Yeah, they're like, so we

finally get our seven heroes

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together and Sonny's immediately

like, alright, let's split up gang

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Xhafer: We've

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been hanging out for thirty seconds

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Ben: and that's too much for me.

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Tilda, Widow, Gaius, and Silvermoon,

you guys go blow up the magic base,

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and, Silvermoon's like, But that puts

Cressida outside of stabby range,

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Xhafer: Hmm, not okay.

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the

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Ben: thing I care about is

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Xhafer: ring I've got some rebar and

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the only

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Ben: doesn't have rebar

anymore, did you notice that?

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Xhafer: I did

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Ben: He has a nice new claw

that has a, dagger in it.

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Xhafer: a throwing thing too.

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Ben: Did you also notice that

Tilda now has two glaives?

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I was very excited.

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Xhafer: Minerva tells Gaius that

he's gonna be a dad and they

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start to kiss before Tilda tells

him that they're literally four

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steps away from a pile of gore.

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Ben: Yeah.

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Like nobody can smell

anything in the Badlands

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Xhafer: Nope.

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You tune it all out.

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Years of exposure.

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Minerva tells Tilda to head

back and live her life.

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and also we find out Tilda is totally

gay with Odessa this whole time.

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Ben: Or at least bi

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Xhafer: Well, yes.

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The

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implication being, she is in a, yes,

a queer relationship with Odessa.

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So, over in the Death Star control room,

uh, the Pilgrim grants the gift and

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kills an Acolyte who refuses the gift.

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And then Cressida is saved by the boats

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invading their island castle

and prepare for battle.

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Ben: Yeah, we get a

convenient, Okay, you're next.

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You dare refuse me?

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Hey, um, We're under attack.

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We'll talk about this later.

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Um, sort of thing.

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And, uh, Yeah, that was the sort

of, like, convenient timing that

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worked out really well for Crescent.

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It

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Xhafer: It did.

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Our heroes land in charge, and

we cut over to the castle where

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they open the gates to greet them.

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And this is where we learn that the Black

Lotus destroyed Azra and spared no one.

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And that makes sense because they

hunted Sunny, He had the gift, Sunny's

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from Azra, et cetera, et cetera.

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So that's why they wanted

Sunny so bad when he was a kid.

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Ben: And we are set up for a giant kung

fu fight in a natural history mu museum.

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Uh, I was all prepped for somebody to

fight up the, the dinosaur skeleton.

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Xhafer: the

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Ben: And the dinosaur cell skeleton

does factor in a little bit, but

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Xhafer: not, as much.

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Ben: as much as I'd like.

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Xhafer: Uh, Cressida says that

she has loved the pilgrim as a

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mother, a woman, and a confessor.

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Ben: Y

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Xhafer: Yeah, I'm hoping

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at least only one of those first two.

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Yikes.

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Uh, she had a vision of

the pilgrim killing her and

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everything around them in ruin.

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He cares not,

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Ben: Hey, you're gonna

kill the whole world.

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And he's just like, No, I'm not like you.

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We've, we've gotten all the way

here because of you following my

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visions, and now you're just like,

yeah, but I don't like this one.

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Xhafer: Right.

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The hubris of man.

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Ben: Uh, we also now

cut over to, uh, Tilda.

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Just popping fools with a Crossbo.

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Xhafer: Yes,

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Ben: it was great.

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Xhafer: Uh, with Gaius and Minerva,

uh, they start to plant bombs when

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MK jumps in to talk shit and get hit.

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We have our big fight

scene in the main hall.

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Where are the spears at?

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I can understand the heroes

not spear fighting, but you've

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got like an army running in.

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This is the situation where

you want a couple dudes.

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With spears.

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You don't want everyone with spears,

but you want a couple dudes with spears

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Ben: I mean, it's, it's inside.

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Xhafer: Exactly.

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Yeah, You want a couple dudes with spears

for this big open room and staircases, but

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that's about all you'd want a spear for.

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Ben: I know.

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But yeah, once you're not in the main

museum room, like a spear might is

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going to definitely be an encumbrance.

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Yeah.

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Xhafer: But it's so easy to

hold a staircase with a spear.

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It's embarrassingly easy to

hold a staircase with a spear.

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Ben: It, it can be if you

know what you, you're doing.

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Xhafer: with a spear, If

you know what you're doing.

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Uh, we see baggie suppress the gift here.

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Ben: Baggies magic now.

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Uh, Jair.

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Yes.

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Woo.

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Her

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Xhafer: Uh, baggie was always magic

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Uh,

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Ben: I think it's better if you

just don't elucidate on that.

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Just what happened here.

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What Ji was always magic.

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You didn't know

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,

Xhafer: uh, gie had the gift.

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Um, and he suppresses the gift

badgie was just always magic,

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just the whole time, it just

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never came up.

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Ben: I never asked.

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Xhafer: Um, I actually think this

has been present for a while.

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Because there's a minute in the

scene where we have, uh, Sunny

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and Badgie a couple episodes ago.

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Ben: Where they're in the, the monastery?

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Xhafer: Well, when they're in the, uh,

when they had just like left, uh, Kanan.

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Oh, okay.

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And he's talking about, like,

activating his gift, and Badgey's

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kinda like, well, I can help.

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I think that was much more like,

not a, I can help kill the dude, but

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a, I can help suppress your gift.

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Ben: Like, I literally can do this.

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Xhafer: Yeah, I literally can do this.

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Also, I was so confused as

to why Badgie was going.

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Except, you've got Nick Frost.

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Ben: I just loved him running

around with his little nunchucks.

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Just

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Xhafer: chucks, just

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Ben: It was very

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Xhafer: I have to get close enough

to press my thumb To your neck.

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And then throw you over to

Sonny so that he can axe you.

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Ben: Uh, I do.

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When he first did it in this

fight, I was just like, wait

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Xhafer: Wait, is

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Ben: is Bady magic now?

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And then later we get like,

uh, a better shot of it.

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Yeah.

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I'm like, Badgi is magic now.

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Xhafer: Yes.

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Uh, I do think, uh, that Badgie

is quite literally from Azra too.

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Cause there's the bit at the end where

it's all like, Oh, the last children of

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Azra, and the man who brought us together.

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But, like, he's still there, too.

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Like, I don't know.

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The Pilgrim could have been

referring to Badgie more than

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one time in those statements.

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Ben: Um,

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Xhafer: without context, it's hard to say.

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Ben: Um,

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Xhafer: the Pilgrim, uh, er, is

it, no, Badgey headbutts a dude

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so hard his head kind of explodes.

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In this fight too.

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Ben: Oh,

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Xhafer: don't know if you caught that.

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Ben: I saw the pilgrim punch a

guy so hard he spits up blood.

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Xhafer: Yeah.

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Yeah.

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The pilgrim punches people so

hard that they, uh, v blood.

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But badgi, headbutts a dude and all

of this blood comes rushing out of

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his mouth and I'm just like, damn,

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Ben: damn.

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Xhafer: That's like liquified brain shit.

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Like that's not pretty.

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No.

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Um.

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Ben: We cut over to Cresta,

just packing her shit.

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Xhafer: just

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Ben: just like, Nope.

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Throw it in the bag.

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I'm outta here.

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Xhafer: We get lots of

cool looking sword fights.

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We see MK versus Tilda, uh, Minerva

and Gaia start to come to a draw.

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Uh, Cressida is packing up some

spell kit stuff and the sacred

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skulls and a dark gif initiate is

just like, oh, I'll squirt you out.

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Sure.

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Yeah.

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Ben: You are Cressida.

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Of course.

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Xhafer: Yeah.

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um, MK can't bring himself to kill Tilda.

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Yes.

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Uh, given your comment earlier,

do you assume that there was a

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romantic relationship between these

two that we completely missed?

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One sided.

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ooh.

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Ben: don't believe, uh, so I wasn't

necessarily implying that, uh, Tilda was

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bi, I was just trying not to box her in.

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Xhafer: The correct thing to do.

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Ben: I got the feeling that, MK

would have no problem killing

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Gaius or the Widow, but has...

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If not, uh, romantic, at least

strong friendship feelings for Tilda

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that wouldn't let him kill her.

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Which also is bringing more to,

when people are activating the

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gift, they don't just go crazy.

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Xhafer: Mm-hmm.

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Ben: It's more controlled.

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Xhafer: Moon finds Cressida who says

that this war is no longer her war,

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and Moon does not give a single fuck.

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Ben: She's like, we don't

have any beefs anymore.

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I'm not fighting here anymore.

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You killed my girlfriend,

but, but I'm leaving.

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It's like, you killed my girlfriend.

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I'm unarmed.

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There's no honor in that.

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You killed my girlfriend.

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Xhafer: Right?

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Ben: like, duh.

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Silvermoon gets tackled quickly

from behind, and while he quickly

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dispatches the guy who attacks

him, Uh, we do get this wonderful

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shot of just Cressida zoopin away

on a boat, just like, Fuck off!

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See

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Xhafer: See you in season four, bitch.

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It comes down

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to Sunny Canaan and bade versus

the Pilgrim in the Fortress Halls.

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The last children of Ara and the

one who brought them together.

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So, Ben, uh, I propose,

what happened here?

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The implication here is that

Bajji brought not just Sunny

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and Kanan, but also the Pilgrim?

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Ben: I didn't get that.

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Xhafer: refers to the group

collectively, we are the last children of

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Ben: Azra.

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Xhafer: Azra.

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He includes himself in this statement.

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Yeah.

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So.

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With the following statement that

implies that Bajji brought the

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pilgrim either to the Badlands or

saved him from Azra or something.

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So wa hapa her,

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Ben: this brings in a giant conundrum

with accents, uh, that I don't

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think this show gave a crap about,

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Xhafer: Sure.

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:

Didn't.

425

:

I was able to read some

production stuff now too.

426

:

since we're done with the show and, season

two and three were filmed in Ireland.

427

:

Yes.

428

:

Season one, Louisiana.

429

:

Ben: Yes.

430

:

, I think, Azra was the, shining beacon

of life in the post apocalypse.

431

:

But it was also very class

stratified, and it was, not a

432

:

place with a lot of opportunities.

433

:

So, hey, you were safe, but you

didn't have a lot of personal freedom.

434

:

Badgie

435

:

doesn't like that.

436

:

Xhafer: No, he wouldn't.

437

:

He doesn't play

438

:

Ben: those games.

439

:

We learn in this episode, Badgie used to

be a pirate, even though he hates boats.

440

:

Uh, heh, so, uh, Badgie,

complicated relationship with

441

:

boats and people who own them.

442

:

Xhafer: Uh,

443

:

Ben: so, I...

444

:

It's possible, but he also had a...

445

:

Ex wife who owned a boat.

446

:

Um, But, I believe that Bajie hated

the constraints of Azra so much

447

:

that he, uh, He became a pirate even

with his hatred and fear of the sea.

448

:

Uh, and that meant when the Black

Lotus did attack and everything went,

449

:

uh, went belly up, He was one of

the few people who had some sort of

450

:

plan, had some sort of idea of, Well,

what do I do outside of the city?

451

:

I would never leave the city.

452

:

It's Azra.

453

:

Why would we go outside?

454

:

Um, how would I escape the city?

455

:

I've never thought to leave.

456

:

And, and Badgie's just like, I got a boat.

457

:

I've got my, you know,

place where I'm tied up.

458

:

Here, a couple of survivors.

459

:

Come with me.

460

:

Come with me.

461

:

Throw them into the boat,

putt, putt, putt, putt, putt,

462

:

putt, and get out of there.

463

:

Xhafer: Get out.

464

:

All right.

465

:

uh, we get some really cool fight

scene stuff here, until Tilda

466

:

jumps in front of Minerva, Saving

her, but sacrificing herself.

467

:

Uh, Tilda becomes Minerva's

468

:

Krillin, her death making her go

Super Saiyan, and she gets the force.

469

:

Ben: Yeah, uh, she is able to just

pick MK up and throw him around.

470

:

Uh, so, Ja'far?

471

:

Xhafer: Yeah, Ben?

472

:

Ben: Ben?

473

:

Let's get weird with it.

474

:

Xhafer: Besides this being

a power that has existed and

475

:

everyone we see is just an idiot.

476

:

Like, or not an idiot, but untrained.

477

:

Mm-hmm.

478

:

,Uh, like we see the master throw

the broom, which then throws MK.

479

:

Same powers.

480

:

This has always been a

thing, we just didn't see it.

481

:

And the people that we know that are

dark gifted that we see regularly

482

:

aren't trained in force, push, and pull.

483

:

Okay.

484

:

Uh, is my actual answer.

485

:

But my weird with it answer, uh,

which is what I should have said

486

:

initially because that's the prompt.

487

:

Uh, is, it's actually the force.

488

:

Ben: Ooh,

489

:

Xhafer: this is a long time

ago in a galaxy far, far away.

490

:

Surprise motherfucker.

491

:

Ben: See?

492

:

Do you fair?

493

:

I think, yes, Ben.

494

:

What the gift does is it doesn't just

turn you into a kung fu badass, the

495

:

gift accentuates and makes you the

best at whatever you are trying to do.

496

:

Xhafer: do.

497

:

Ben: So, for most of our people,

who are just violent psychopaths

498

:

in a post apocalypse, who where

fighting is all you're doing,

499

:

Xhafer: that

500

:

Ben: all you would

conceive of doing with it.

501

:

Yeah.

502

:

But, Minerva, she's educated.

503

:

She's learned the classics.

504

:

And by that I mean, she has

a, uh, novelization of, uh,

505

:

several Star Wars films.

506

:

And so, when her power activated, she had

other ideas of what she could do with it.

507

:

And so, she actually, in a similar vein,

she drew not on the force, but on the

508

:

concept of the force, as written by

many, uh, Star Wars Legends authors.

509

:

Uh,

510

:

Xhafer: heh heh heh.

511

:

heh heh.

512

:

Alright,

513

:

Um, Gaius

514

:

actually checks on Tilda

while Minerva plants bombs.

515

:

Yes.

516

:

Um, and, uh, oh, well.

517

:

So, Minerva, Minerva kills MK.

518

:

Yes.

519

:

Ben: Yes.

520

:

Xhafer: Uh, we find that Tilda

has a pulse but needs a doctor.

521

:

She is not going to survive long.

522

:

The fight at the fort is down to Sonny

and the pilgrim For the moment, Sonny

523

:

gets run through on his own sword.

524

:

Uh, Kanan uses the distraction

to turn on the pilgrim's.

525

:

Suspension.

526

:

Kink,

527

:

Ben: uh, ugh.

528

:

Gross.

529

:

Uh, she hooks 'em

530

:

Xhafer: yums.

531

:

Ben: Don't yuck.

532

:

Someone's yums.

533

:

If you have a suspension kink,

probably you want me yucking your yums

534

:

because it's part of it.

535

:

Xhafer: Not sure if agreeing or you are.

536

:

Kink.

537

:

Yuming.

538

:

Yucking.

539

:

embarrassment kink, Ben.

540

:

Ben: Both!

541

:

Kink

542

:

Xhafer: streams are getting

crossed, I don't know anymore.

543

:

Ben: your

544

:

Xhafer: said, so your kink

545

:

Ben: is getting kinked?

546

:

Xhafer: ding.

547

:

Yeah.

548

:

uh,

549

:

badgi is holding the Pilgrim suspended

in air while Sonny uns stabs himself.

550

:

Bad idea.

551

:

Yeah.

552

:

And kills the Pilgrim.

553

:

Ben: By jumping off of Badgie.

554

:

Xhafer: By jumping off of Badgi.

555

:

He dies in the process.

556

:

His eyes do a glow thing we

have absolutely no context for.

557

:

Ben: Yes.

558

:

Uh, so, uh, Sunny's eyes do a glow thing.

559

:

Mhm.

560

:

And he, he dies in the center

of the Natural History Museum.

561

:

As

562

:

Xhafer: Built into a castle.

563

:

Ben: as, that would be how

my son would want to go out.

564

:

Just die surrounded by dinos.

565

:

You know, what more

could you possibly want?

566

:

Xhafer: Over at the Death Star

Control Room, Minerva plants the

567

:

bombs and gives MK his compass back.

568

:

They blow it up, I guess

no face turn for MK.

569

:

Ben: No.

570

:

Xhafer: Uh, Kanan hosts a

funeral for Sonny with Badgie.

571

:

He says he's gonna raise Henry.

572

:

Guess he didn't get the

memo about Momnerva.

573

:

Ben: Nerva.

574

:

Xhafer: Uh, Sunny is caught

between life and death.

575

:

and is gonna train with the Master while

his body is restoring life to itself.

576

:

Ben: That was the Master.

577

:

Xhafer: That was the Master.

578

:

Okay.

579

:

Ben: I wasn't, I I didn't recognize them.

580

:

We saw them in one

episode, four episodes ago.

581

:

?

Xhafer: yeah.

582

:

Uh, subtitles.

583

:

They said, the first thing

they said was off screen.

584

:

You always get a character name.

585

:

Oh.

586

:

Ben: Ah, okay.

587

:

Xhafer: Uh, we get a

big season 4 setup here.

588

:

Ben: Yeah.

589

:

So during his death, uh, Sonny's

Powers turned on and it is healing him.

590

:

Really hope it is not a funeral

pyre, uh, funeral . Um, yeah.

591

:

Uh, yeah, he, I do think he dies.

592

:

I think

593

:

Xhafer: the the language that's used is,

he has died and it will be coming back.

594

:

And I think that's important specifically

because of when he does fall to

595

:

the ground, he is holding his hands

out like a certain messiah figure.

596

:

Ben: They say his body is healing itself.

597

:

Xhafer: Yeah, his body is

restoring life to itself.

598

:

Ben: I do think he was...

599

:

dead.

600

:

Xhafer: Yeah, yeah, he was dead.

601

:

And, uh, to be perfectly honest,

without season four, he dead.

602

:

Ben: Well, no, because they

set up that he's coming back.

603

:

Xhafer: So, okay, well.

604

:

Ben: You don't meet a space ghost,

or a, uh, a spirit ghost, who

605

:

says, You're coming back because

there's more evils to fight.

606

:

And then they go, Oh

wait, no, oops, sorry.

607

:

You check it out.

608

:

Xhafer: And those more evils...

609

:

Guns?

610

:

Yes.

611

:

Ben: the one really, like,

most petulant, uh, uh,

612

:

Xhafer: uh, what was,

613

:

Ben: What is the name

614

:

Xhafer: for accolade?

615

:

Ben: Acolyte guy, uh, who was...

616

:

Made MK seem, uh, Seem well

thought and put together.

617

:

He found a gun.

618

:

That's not great.

619

:

Xhafer: Yeah.

620

:

And that's the show.

621

:

Ben: Yep.

622

:

So our, our big bad is dead.

623

:

MK is dead.

624

:

Yeah.

625

:

Uh, Sonny is dead.

626

:

Xhafer: Tilda's probably dead.

627

:

We don't,

628

:

Ben: I'm sure she'll get better.

629

:

Xhafer: they seem like they're

pretty far away from help.

630

:

I'm sure it's the kind of thing that they

leave as a plot point for mid season four.

631

:

Ben: Oh, I was thinking it would be, hey,

we were putting this in here in case you

632

:

decide not to come back, uh, but you'll

probably be six month jump, you're fine,

633

:

uh, for the premiere of the next season.

634

:

Xhafer: They do love their

six month jump in this show.

635

:

Ben: Yeah.

636

:

Xhafer: So, All right.

637

:

well, with all of that said...

638

:

Why don't we review our predictions

real quick since there's

639

:

no point in making anymore.

640

:

Ben: All right.

641

:

Xhafer: And then, next week we

will go through a synopsis and see

642

:

how correct or incorrect we were.

643

:

Ben: Alright.

644

:

So for, uh, season one, episode one, I had

daytime Ryder tries to overthrow his dad.

645

:

Evening, Azra is real but it's shitty.

646

:

That seems like it might be true now.

647

:

They kind of destroyed it.

648

:

And primetime, Lydia kills

Quinn and frames Sunny.

649

:

I've

650

:

Xhafer: I've got Nick Frost shows up.

651

:

Uh, Sunny will betray the Baron Quinn

and leave the Red Armadillo camp.

652

:

Uh,

653

:

Azra is an all it's cracked

up to be slash is just as bad

654

:

as the Badlands, if not worse.

655

:

Ben: Okay,

656

:

Xhafer: for

657

:

Ben: Season 2, Episode 1, I have, uh,

Daytime, a Sunny Escapes, in parenthesis,

658

:

from the mine, uh, uh, Evening,

Badgie helps him with the escape, and

659

:

Primetime, Quinn wants to use the Sunny

Veil Baby to get back to being Baron.

660

:

Uh, my daytime, Badgie and Sonny

reconcile, slash, this is their plan all

661

:

along, slash, this ending doesn't matter.

662

:

Xhafer: Uh, where has betrayed the other.

663

:

Ben: like they're

betrayed at the end there.

664

:

Yes.

665

:

One has betrayed the other.

666

:

Xhafer: Uh, my evening is M.

667

:

K.

668

:

's master has the same dark gift

as the rest of it and can just

669

:

use it without going mindless.

670

:

And

671

:

My prime time is M.

672

:

K.

673

:

rescues Sonny.

674

:

Once he gets his shit under control,

that might have happened, but it

675

:

sure didn't while we were watching.

676

:

No, we then go to

677

:

Ben: we then go to season two,

episode five, where I've got daytime,

678

:

uh, Nass and crew Chase, Sonny.

679

:

It does not go well for them.

680

:

uh, I still think that happened.

681

:

We'll find out.

682

:

Xhafer: out.

683

:

Ben: Uh, Evening, Ava chases MK, but

decides to, uh, decides to join him.

684

:

You remember Ava?

685

:

You remember when she was a character?

686

:

Xhafer: Barely.

687

:

Ben: And Primetime,

Quinn leaves Lydia alive.

688

:

The, uh, Waldo finds her after Quinn

leaves the bunker, and they team up.

689

:

Xhafer: Uh,

690

:

my Daytime, NAS shows

up again and gets got.

691

:

My evening, we won't see Amelia

again, which is specifically

692

:

in the episodes we watch.

693

:

Ben: I don't think that mattered.

694

:

I don't

695

:

Xhafer: I don't think I don't

think it mattered, but I, I

696

:

will make the distinction now

as I made when I claimed it.

697

:

Um, in prime time.

698

:

uh, they make it back into the Badlands

before the start of Season three.

699

:

Then we get season 3 episode 1.

700

:

By the start of season 3.

701

:

Ben: We lucked out hitting all

of our season, season premieres.

702

:

That was cool.

703

:

Uh, I got daytime.

704

:

The Pilgrim is the big bad.

705

:

Hey!

706

:

Evening, uh, the finale

is them defending Azra.

707

:

Azra is wherever we are, Ja'far.

708

:

Xhafer: Bullshit,

709

:

Ben.

710

:

Ben: man.

711

:

Azra is in your heart.

712

:

Xhafer: Keep,

713

:

Keep going, you've got more predictions

714

:

to list that actually matter.

715

:

Ben: than the list

716

:

Xhafer: Uh, Badgie ends up as

Tilda's regent as she rules

717

:

the Badlands at the end.

718

:

Uh,

719

:

Daytime, Quinn, not dead.

720

:

And not looking good.

721

:

And that's Season 3, Episode 1.

722

:

So if we find out he dies well

before that, then we know.

723

:

Um, Evening, MK learns the real gift is

the friendship we make along the way.

724

:

Well, I mean, it's not the

friendship we were expecting.

725

:

No,

726

:

Ben: rebar.

727

:

Xhafer: it's the rebar.

728

:

It's the rebar.

729

:

Um, Primetime, Henry will

be in a Kung Fu fight.

730

:

Nope.

731

:

Uh, we didn't see one , that's for sure.

732

:

Ben: Then we get jumped, uh, to

season three, episode seven, where

733

:

I had daytime the boat sinks.

734

:

I, we'd never see, uh, uh, Lily again.

735

:

Uh, I'm guessing they sank that boat.

736

:

. Yeah.

737

:

So my evening prediction, Sunny Sister

becomes Queen of Azra, which can be

738

:

true, uh, Ja'far, if Azra is in your

739

:

Xhafer: heart.

740

:

Ben, we've been over

741

:

Ben: Azra is wherever, is

wherever two people believe.

742

:

Um, and primetime, the widow

sacrifices herself in the finale.

743

:

Xhafer: Daytime, Sunny's Sister shows up.

744

:

Yep.

745

:

Evening, the pilgrim was exiled from Ezra.

746

:

Possibly.

747

:

We'll, We'll see when we read

748

:

Ben: the recap.

749

:

Xhafer: The recap, and then

primetime Tilda dies in the finale.

750

:

Ben: Next we have season three,

episode 14, curse of the Red Rain.

751

:

Xhafer: My daytime

prediction is moon dies.

752

:

My evening is mk face turn.

753

:

Uh, which means he

becomes a good guy again.

754

:

If you're not familiar with,

uh, wrestling pro wrestling

755

:

terminology and my prime time?

756

:

Sunny Dies.

757

:

Ben: Yep.

758

:

Uh, I had daytime Silver Moon kills

Cressida Evening the widow gets her

759

:

gift back and uses it to heal a dying

Tilda at the cost of her own life.

760

:

Should have stopped about

halfway through that sentence.

761

:

Xhafer: You were so close.

762

:

When Tilda jumped in front of that and

til, and, uh, Minerva got the gift,

763

:

I'm like, oh, Ben fucking called it.

764

:

Yeah.

765

:

I was rooting for you in a way

that wouldn't make me lose our

766

:

game, but would still let you be.

767

:

Correct.

768

:

Ben: If they hadn't, like, if she had

not still been pregnant, maybe they

769

:

would've done that, but like, okay,

she's, we're not going to have the

770

:

pregnant lady die to save somebody.

771

:

Yeah.

772

:

Um, And then primetime, uh, Kanan

shows up out of nowhere to save

773

:

Sunny, and ends up raising Henry.

774

:

Xhafer: Okay.

775

:

Well, she does survive, but she's, like,

fourth on the emergency contact list.

776

:

Ben: weird, because she's the aunt.

777

:

Xhafer: Yeah, but, I mean, she's also a

blood relation that he's known for, like,

778

:

A minute.

779

:

Ben: I mean, yeah,

780

:

Xhafer: Minerva and Guy.

781

:

Minerva and Gais make the most sense

because they're a couple in, a, they're

782

:

Ben: well off

783

:

Xhafer: In a financial position

and also willing parents.

784

:

So those are really the

boxes you want checked.

785

:

I would say more so

than a blood connection.

786

:

But maybe that's just my

bitterness about not being

787

:

Henry's godfather coming out, Ben.

788

:

Yeah, Fair enough, that's bad a call.

789

:

Alright, well with that said, we

will be back next week with our

790

:

synopsis and scoring session.

791

:

For End of the Badlands.

792

:

Ben: we'll read what happened, we'll see

how we did, and then, uh, Ja'far will get

793

:

to pick the next show because he cheats.

794

:

Xhafer: Just throwing it out there now.

795

:

It's one point Ben.

796

:

I'll tell you what, if

I win by one point...

797

:

we'll,

798

:

We'll, go to a coin flip.

799

:

We will go to the old ways and do a coin.

800

:

Flip

801

:

Ben: the coin.

802

:

The

803

:

Xhafer: call.

804

:

Ben: ARA

805

:

.

Xhafer: All right.

806

:

well we'll see you next week, internet.

807

:

But before we get there, we got to make

sure that we say thank you to Ripe.

808

:

Ben: Yeah.

809

:

Xhafer: God.

810

:

Damn Goon Squad is a good song

and you let us use it as our theme

811

:

music and I still feel great.

812

:

Every time I get to throw

that into a fucking edit.

813

:

I love this song.

814

:

You're also an excellent band.

815

:

Find more of their music

wherever you listen to streaming.

816

:

Ben: I listen to it a lot on Spotify,

and they're a fun, uh, YouTube follow

817

:

because they put out videos constantly.

818

:

Xhafer: Yeah, they just dropped

a music video for Brendan, right?

819

:

Yes.

820

:

Which a couple episodes

ago you said was...

821

:

the song yes.

822

:

Ben: they also do like,

uh, YouTube shorts,

823

:

Xhafer: Oh.

824

:

Ben: every couple of days.

825

:

Uh, yeah, it's fun.

826

:

Uh, also thank you to Annette Lucina for

your photograph of a TV that you, uh,

827

:

licensed under Creative Commons so we

were able to use it for our podcast art.

828

:

Xhafer: Alright.

829

:

Ben: And we will see you

next time on Last Time On.

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About the Podcast

Last Time On
Who's Got Time For All This Prestige TV?
Who has time for all this prestige television these days? Not us! That's why Ben and Xhafer are going through "must watch" TV by skipping a random number of episodes in-between each viewing and connecting the dots on what happened. What happened Last Time On? What happen hurr?

Shout out to Ripe for our theme music, Goon Squad. Find them wherever you listen to music.

About your hosts

Benjamin Curley

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Xhafer Husen

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